Parenting Crimes .......

The week has given me cause for reflection - in the photo above you can see my lovely Tom.( He is going flatting in January). This week he reminded me again how one of the hardest things to do as a parent  is to stand back and let your kid sort it out.  This week he had to find a work placement as part of his Polytech course. The work placement was due to start Monday and by Monday he still had not had any luck in finding someone to take him on. Getting into fix it mode I started thinking of favours I could call in. When none of them turned up trumps I got mad. Haven't I done so many favours for so many kids in the course of my work?? Look - I have Chloe here as proof of that. I was indignant that the universe had not complied with my request.  Fool that I am - the necessary learning was for Tom to persevere and find his own placement. At the 11th hour he did! And is now having a great time and a well earned sense of satisfaction that he made this happen without the help of his mother!!


A parcel a week has morphed into a phone call a week in  my house. Postage to the USA is horrendous and to send Rosies birthday presents cost an outrageous $52!!  What was even worse was the entire contents of the parcel were only worth about $20. The star attraction - a new bottle of perfume had been sniffed out as a prohibited item by the shrewd post office attendant. The box was cut open the offending item removed and the rest sent off. Still by all accounts the birthday passed very well and marked a new milestone in our house - that is not being home for the birthday. The first ever!!  Instead of making a birthday cake I made instead some homemade bread. It is the no knead recipe from Anabel Langbein.  Delicious.

Here's to a week of  trusting that our kids have all the qualities they need to figure it out. The trick is to to  know when.

Cheers Marg

On parenting and parcels that fail to arrive.

Here they are Tom and Rosie with Brooke , Tom's girlfriend on the right.  You can't see Tom's hands but I've long held a not so secret dream for these hands.I thought they could make him a fortune by becoming accessory models. You know modelling man- jewellery, bracelets, rings and wrist watches. Rosie and I have frequently thought it unfair that that the boy should have been born with the long slender fingers that tan at the slightest hint of sunshine.  This week those hands have been attaching cups to cows udders( as part of a practicum he's had to do) and apparently enjoying it!!! Now I have to admit to myself that the time is long overdue for me to release my children from the tyranny of my spoken and unspoken expectations and aspirations  for them.  And as the days for saying goodbye to school for the  last time approach he must be free to pursue whatever path his life intends for him. I will watch and see with interest.

A while back in moment of light heartedness we 3, made up a family motto.

"Don't tell lies.,don't steal and try to be a good person."

I guess if I can hang onto any aspirations at all for my kids it is that they would value their own human qualities beyond things, possesions and a career. Even then they will decide. I do think this is the hardest part of the parenting journey. The part that lets them go. So if you have little kids enjoy every moment of the experience!!

This is the errant parcel- who knows where it is malingering - maybe at the bottom of a pile of stuff somewhere or delivered to another address. I'm sorry Rosie it's not there. It's got a mini birthday kit in it for you to enjoy with your friends before you come home. The strange looking white photo is a pass the parcel complete with insructions. I thought you might have some fun with that. Anyway if it turns up enjoy and I will assemble the very last parcel for they year and hopefully it will get to you before you leave.

Progress inside and out is slow this week. You can see where the new fence is going to go and the gravel area is in preparation for the paving tiles which will go on top. everywhere I look there is something that is the beginning of something else. A layer of chaos has descended over every available space in the property. I am trying to maintain an inner calm knowing that it will all come together soon. Meanwhile I might clear out for a long walk on this beautiful day. Grab a coffee on the way and enjoy other peoples order.

Have a  great week.

Marg